Let the tyrant die for it!

Hey,
I haven't forgotten this. This blog hasn't gone to virtual moth balls. I find community at its best when it is united against a challenge. I find my Christian community to be most powerful when I am personally focused upon what Christ was focused upon--Loving God and loving others. I don't need Christian community to keep my flesh happy--in fact my flesh would rather do without them.

Yet, in a time alone, I found community in a brother in Christ who has been with Christ for a long time already. Thomas Brooks was a Puritan Pastor almost 400 years ago and penned the following:

"Sin cannot say of a believer as the centuion said fo his servants, 'I bid one, Go0, and he goeth; and to another, Come, and he cometh; and to another, Do this, and he doeth' (Mat 8:9). No! the hear tof a saint riseth agaisntg the commands of sin; and when sin would carry his sould to the devil, he hales his sin before the Lord, and cries out for justice. Lord! saith the believing sould, sin plays the tyrant, the devil in me; it would have me to do that which makes against thy holiness as well as against my happiness; against thy honour and glory, as my comfort and peace; therefore do me justice, thou righteous Judge of heaven adn earht, and let the tyrant sin die for it!"

Try that prayer in the face of sin next time.

I believe in groups becaues I believe in individuals

I believe we need to be in community because I believe in the importance of an individual person.

When I was in college I had a period where I was part of a ROTC program. Part of that deal was that I needed to run a 1.5 mile race and had to do it in a certain amount of time. I have never been that much of a runner but was young and had an ego so I thought I would try to win.
Shortly after the race started one guy ran ahead of me and I decided that second place wouldn't be so bad. But i did decide to keep up with him. And I did, until the last quarter mile when he ran ahead. It turns out that he was a runner or something.

The point is that I ran faster than I ever have (and probably ever will). I was under nine minutes for the whole thing! That is under a six minute mile. On the sheet that marks my time, my name was next to that time and no one else's name was recorded there. However, I never would have run that fast if I wasn't running with someone who could push me to run faster.

There is potential in us that cannot be tapped into unless we are in community. I particularly believe this when it comes to men. We are made to "not be alone" but our community usually has a lot more to do with the lowest common denominator than it does with challenging and spurring each other on.

Context

Why do I see more in the Gospel of John this time than I have seen in the last five times I have read it? I am not reading it alone. I am reading with others in my church. Our church is reading one chapter a day from the Gospel of John over 21 days (see the link in my last post). I am not thinking about particular people in my church as I read, but when I read I am just seeing more. Why?

Maybe I am paying attention better? Maybe I just know that I am not alone. Maybe it reminds me that my Spiritual life isn't just about me, my Bible and the Holy Spirit. I don't know. I do know that following Christ with others is just better.

In the garden

As a church we are going through a 21 day challenge where we are reading through the gospel of John one chapter a day (http://21daysinjohn.blogspot.com/). This has led me to look deeper at John 15. Jesus' heart for his disciples and his concern for them in his impending departure is clearly evident. He gets them centered on who he is as the vine and who they are as branches. "If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit. Apart from me, you can do nothing."

But Jesus must speak to the painful experience of being pruned. The disciples will experience pruning from the hand of the father. That is the cutting back of growth that is not aligned with the father. This can take an unlimited number of forms of sufferings, hardship or set back--at least in our eyes. Yet, the rose gardener knoww that unless the rose bush is pruned, it will choke itself on its own branches and thorns and will never reach its full potential of beauty. It is easy to be the pruner on a rose bush, but hard to be the one under the pruner's scissor. I believe that out of the pain of pruning comes the temptation to disconnect from the vine. That drives Jesus repeated calls for his followers to remain.

He says remain in me and then breaks it down into two categories: remain in my words and remain in my love--remain in my grace and remain in my truth. We remain in his words by listening to his words through our experience of pruning. We remain in his love by obeying (trusting his love through faith), and in particular, obeying his command for us to love one another.

When we are being pruned, it is so tempting for us to disengage and to isolate. Yet, the only way through the experience is faith and faith in action. So, in the pruning season, we must lean into his word even more and lean into our fellowship with others even more. That is NOT easy--yet it is the call to discipleship. We trust the love of the father to allow him to remove parts of our lives without our permission knowing the pruning will make us more fruitful.

Yet, none of us have enough faith for this. When we are in the vine, we are grafted into a community. We must always be on the look out to be sure that no one among us begins to disconnect under the weight of the pruning (Heb 3:13). Depression, addiction, despair, distraction are all awaiting the attention of those who want to avoid the pruning hand of the father. So when we follow Christ in community we are not just remaining in his word for the sake of our own obedience, but we remain in his love for one another, loving each other and reminding one another of the gently, kind hand of the Father.

More thoughts on Facebook, part 2

Is Facebook just an extension of how I already view community? If I duck real relationships in person, Facebook will probably become this shallow play land with me in the middle. But if I have built real relationships over time, Facebook could keep me in touch with those real relationships and even suppport the ongoing influence of those relationships in my life.

Take Edwin Tennefoss for example. He just found me and now we are friends on Facebook. Edwin and I met in 1992 when I was learning about God and Christ was becoming more and more real to me. That was the year when Ed and I met and we saw God do amazing things. This is a connection that transcends time. Ed and I haven't been in touch really for fifteen years and he only really knows me from back then. My friendship with him transcends a few seasons of my life.

My connection Ed reminds me how real God is because it reminds me of what God has done in the past when I met Ed. When I interact with Ed through Facebook I am brought back to remember all that I saw God do in, through and with me and Ed that year. That is a good thing if I allow it to be. It could be a bad thing if I allow it to be. Does this mean that Facebook and technology like it is morally neutral?

What do you think of Facebook? Part 1

All right. I got into Facebook because everyone else was doing it. It was really cool when I got connected with people I hadn't seen since my wedding. I have actually looked at a couple of their pictures of their kids and looked at what they are doing at times. I even got in contact with my cousin which is awesome. We never really got on the phone with each other and live too far away. But I have mixed feelings.
My home page tells me that I have 80 friends--that is particularly affirming and certainly 80 more than I think I had in Middle School. But are they really my friends? Who are they and what role do they play in my life? Obviously I keep in touch with some of them more than others, but who are these people and how do I categorize them? Forgive me for over-engineering this thing (can't you just enjoy this?). Seriously, what expectations ought we have of our friends on facebook.
I think I would like to listen to you on this one and then weigh in a week later. My thinking right now leads me to lean on my last blog entry ("Are you in my personal space?") and think that Facebook is a unique social circle with me in the middle.
What do you think?

Are you in my personal space?

Joseph Myers in his book, The Search to Belong wrote about the different kinds of ways we find belonging. He used the concept developed in the sixties called proxemics to put this together. You know this concept because you use the phrase, "you are in my personal space, please get out!"

Myers defines belonging this way: "Belonging happens when you identify with another entity--a person or organization, or perhaps a species, cluture, or ethnic group." The Search to Belong, p. 25

How do the different spaces of belonging work out?
Public Belonging--a large community that we each find a sense of belonging from. I am an Eagles fan and have a sense of belonging with other Eagles fans that I don't know. I belong to Willowdale Chapel though I don't know everyone who attends there. I find belonging as a Blue Hen, a UD grad. From the proxemics point of view, this parallels public space--when there is generally 12'+ space. That is why people generally don't want to be in the front row at church. Too close for public space! Now, you might not think that this connection is very powerful, but don't tell that to the 65,000 people who spend unreal money to belong at each Eagles home game. A football stadium event is an event in belonging. Nobody knows anything else about anybody in that stadium except that they are crazy for the Eagles. Many of these people bend their lives around this community. Myers puts it this way: "They connect because of the outside influence, not because of shared personal information." p.41

Social Community--These are my friends that tend to be acquaintances. I hang out with them at work and may have lunch with them. These are not people you will share the intimate details of your life, but they will often hear (though maybe not remember) what you did last weekend. I belong to my small group in this way. Often times these are the friendships that get kicked around because they are "shallow" and only concern "superficial" things. Yet, they are powerful because they draw us into neighbor-like relationships. Neighborhoods have always provided safety and care throughout the centuries. This could be geographical neighborhoods or the neighborhoods that come into being through small groups and Sunday Schools. One family in my small group are going through a very challenging time as the wife has undergone two surgeries in a week. She has never really bore any personal intimate details of her life and we haven't asked her to, yet. But she is experiencing community as she is recieving, meals, visits, phone calls, babysitting, etc. from these very powerful and at times "superficial" friendships. She belongs to our small group, and doggonit, we are going to care for her!

Personal Belonging--Myers describes it this way, "Personal space is where we connect through sharing private--although not "naked"--experiences, feelings, and thoughts... These are the relationships that most people mention when they think of "community."" p. 49-50 I have found these kind of friendships consistently through the years in two-three other men to whom I am accountable to in my walk with Christ. I don't "nakedly dump" by stuff on them, but I open myself up to them in a disciplined and authentic way for the purpose of being known and challenged to grow.

Intimate Belonging-- "In intimate space, we share "naked" experiences, feelings, and thoughts. Very few relationships are intimate. Intimate relationships are those in which anothe rperson know the "naked truth" about us and yet the tow of us are "not ashamed." Myers p. 50-51 Nakedness and lack of shame mark this kind of belonging. This is quite often a spouse and/or a best friend.

Sometimes intimate belonging is thought to be the "goal of community". Myers suggest that someone with a healthy experience of belonging hold a harmonious set of connections within the four spaces. What do you think?

What happens when we get rid of the Intolerable Burden

I found this outstanding quote that follows up on the topic from the earlier posting entitled, "An Explaining Mechanism Kicks in."

"Luther, Calvin and those who followed them inisted that the fruit of justification is faith active in love. A living faith expresses itself in works of love, in service to the neighbor.... Such love is directed in the first instance not toward God in hope of attaining some merit toward salvation, but toward one's neighbor, for "the Christian lives not in himself, but in Christ and his neighbor." Luther urged Christians to perform good works out of spontaneous love in obedience to God for the sake of others. To put it in other words, justification by faith alone frees me to love my neighbor disinterestedly, for his or her own sake, as my sister or brother, not as the calculated means to my own desired ends.

Since we no longer have to carry around the intolerable burden of self-justification, we are free "to be Christs unto one another," as Luther put it, to expend ourselves on behalf of one another, even as Christ also loved us and gave Himself for us.

From The Mark of Jesus by Timothy George and John Woodbridge p. 41

What do we talk about?

I talk a lot with people. Sometimes I wonder if I am doing a good job at it. I can chat all day about most things and only on few occasions have people fallen asleep on me. What I really mean is—do the topics of conversation I wander to reflect God’s concerns? Or, another way to put this is; “If community is going to be genuinely Christian, what will we talk about? We will talk about following Christ.” Paul put it this way:

“And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses, entrust to reliable men, who will also be qualified to teach others….Remember my gospel…” 2 Timothy 2:2, 8

What did he want Timothy to talk about? The things he said in front of many witnesses. From the rest of his writings, his central message and the overall teaching that holds everything together is the gospel (Col 1:6-8): The good news.

This is what gives Christian community teeth. It is the only thing that sets it apart as Christian. Mormons, Jews, Jehovah Witnesses all talk about the Bible and so should we. But the gospel is the message over which Paul said, if somebody teaches you something contrary, let them be condemned (Gal 1). In other words, it is the Christian interpretation of scripture. It sees the entire scripture through the lens of the incarnation, the crucifixion, the resurrection and ascension of the Lord Jesus Christ. These historical events bear upon our every minute life. It is the message that teaches and the teaching that calls me to a response.

My fear is that it is easy for us to unknowingly teach something else—not by directly teaching against the gospel, but—by ignoring its importance in our conversation.

So, how are you responding in faith to the gospel today? I am by writing this. Ask me tomorrow.

I found the quote

I found the quote that I mentioned in the last posting:

It was from an episode of the sitcom, Coach in February of 1995:
“When one man talks about loving another man, an explaining mechanism kicks in.”

"An Explaining Mechanism Kicks In"

If I was a little cooler, I would remember the show that I heard that line on. I bring up the “explaining mechanism” because I think it is one of the chief hindrances to following Christ in genuine community.

We have explaining mechanisms that we use with others in order for us to feel “ok” about ourselves before them. We explain ourselves. We justify ourselves. I catch myself doing that when somebody notices a new product I might have bought.

“I got it on sale…”

“We really needed it…”

Why do I feel the need to explain it? At the heart of what we do when we begin explaining ourselves to others is that we begin answering to them. We begin fearing them and we begin posturing ourselves so that in our day of court before them, we can come out in the right. And the sad thing about it all is that THEY DON’T CARE!

Though no one cares, our posturing hides our true selves from others and puts invisible boundaries to our ability to build friendship. When we are justifying ourselves before others, we are living duplicitously. We are projecting a person we want others to see. What happens is that they never get to know the real person behind ourselves. And neither do we.

A spiral can occur in this situation. The more we project, the more we believe that we are the people that we project. As we distance others from our real selves, we distance ourselves from who God made us to be. When we experience the inevitable dissonance of this false self, an insecurity is produced which accelerates the whole thing even further.

This is one place where following Christ makes all of the difference in our experience of community. If he is the one who justifies us (Rom 3:24), we no longer have to. In the safety of his grace, we can be honest about ourselves to others and our self and then take the long journey, in the company of others, to genuine self understanding. The truth, as they say, becomes our friend.

Richard Foster speaks of this in his chapter on Solitude in The Celebration of Discipline:

“Silence is one of the deepest disciplines of the Spirit simply because it puts the stopper on all self-justification. One of the fruits of silence is the freedom to let God be our justifier. We don’t need to straighten others out…. Perhaps more than anything else, silence brings us to believe that God can care for us—‘reputation and all.’”

Maybe a way for us to trust God in following Christ is to simply say less about ourselves, trust God with what others think about us and focus more of our energies on what others have to say about themselves.

How do we get past the superficial?

So the solution to my situation with my group is to allow a little more authenticity to infect my group. How does that work? Vulnerability is a dynamic that must be nurtured among friends and within groups. If one friend makes themself vulnerable, the response of the people in the room (taking their cues from the leaders and influencers) will shape the way others respond in vulnerability. If genuine empathy is shown in that moment, others will follow (eventually) in sharing from weakness. If grace is shown, confession will follow. A good friend of mine has spoken prophetically that “confession happens in the context of grace.” This is true of our relationship with God as well as our relationships with others.

So, authenticity within a group becomes a process. As each friend expresses their concern, grace and empathy can be shown. (I do not divorce grace from accountability—just wait). As the group proves itself to be a place of grace and empathy, the group proves itself to be a place that merits greater transparency. Then more transparency comes out into the group, once again testing its level of grace and empathy. Once it proves that test, it is deemed, by its members, to be a place that can handle their stuff.

We as leaders need to nurture the environment that makes it a place of grace and empathy. People are lonelier than ever and they are isolated from genuine friendships more than ever—and yet are often more sensitive than ever. We need to be trained in how to be friends. We need to be trained to love one another in a way that shows honor, respect and yet can also express the truth in love.

This can be easier said than done. What ideas do you have? Try this one on. Pray that God will show you (and your group or set of friends) an opportunity to express grace to someone (give them something that they cannot produce for themselves). Cut their grass, help them paint, babysit their kids, give them a gift card, write them a note, etc. When you see it, seize it and draw in everyone you can to participate. Thereby demonstrating to the recipient, and all who participate, that this is a place of grace. It will demonstrate that God is with you. Who doesn’t want to be a part of that?

“You know what has happened…how God anointed Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy Spirit and power, and how he went around doing good….”

Acts 10:38-39

We all have needs, except me

So Tony called and said, “I noticed your grass was long and it sounded like you have been too busy to get to it. I love cutting grass and I am off Tuesday. How about I come over and cut it for you.”

Most people would be grateful. I was to a point. I was certainly impressed by his initiative. But I was also defensive (inside). I can do this myself. I don’t need you is what I thought.

To give a little background, Tony is in my small group and the night before we were looking at Acts 2. In Acts 2, we saw that because of the radical work of the Spirit and the God-infused love they had for one another, nobody had a need that wasn’t met. We talked as a group about the kinds of needs we had. Because we all had young kids, most of us had household projects that just couldn’t get done because of the physical demands of having young children.

Tony was being the model small group member. He was not just listening to the word, but he was doing what it said. And I didn’t like it. I don’t want to have need. Isn’t that the whole vision of living in Suburbia? To build a life where I can live in isolation allowing people in where I want and keeping them at a distance here I feel safe, secure and in control.

But I am not. If you want evidence, come look at the 3000 dandelions in my front yard that declare my lack of control to everyone who drives by.

So, thanks Tony for your help. In more ways than you know.

The Assumptions and Presumptions of Outreach

I love it—It is simple, clear and it gives me a vision about what my life, my group and my church should look like.

“Love God, love each other and love the world Jesus sends us to serve”

Though this is my church's vision statement, this isn’t a new vision for God’s people. It is the vision that Moses laid out back in Deuteronomy. The Jews understood themselves to be the light of the world (Isaiah 49:7). In Paul’s day however, the vision for outreach became a false prop that enabled them to see themselves favorably without dealing with their own inherent flaws.

"if you know his will and approve of what is superior because you are instructed by the law; if you are convinced that you are a guide for the blind, a light for those who are in the dark,… You who brag about the law, do you dishonor God by breaking the law? As it is written: "God's name is blasphemed among the Gentiles because of you.

Romans 2:18-19, 23-24

The Jews were proud in their national identity to be a light to the world, yet they weren’t living out the vision on the inside, so instead of being a light to the Gentiles, causing them to bless the name of Yahweh, they only drew curses to Yahweh from the mouths of the Gentiles.

Bono sung once, “that we glorify the past when the future dries up.” Similarly, when living out the "love for one another" becomes hard, churches can look outward to missions and projects outside of their own sphere, not to be a light, but to feel good about themselves. They don’t minister out of an overflow of the richness of their Biblical community. They reach out as a substitute and a false prop to keep them from doing the hard work within their own lives and their own community. It feels good for a while, but eventually what is in the well comes up in the bucket.

I used to think this way about small groups. I used to disdain groups that helped one another with their own projects. I thought to myself—they should look outward and help those outside the faith—and I was right. But, It would be vain and short-lived for them to only think about ministering outside if they are not committed to meeting the needs of each other. We cannot forget Jesus command, “Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.” (John 13:34)

To pursue the great commission without honoring and obeying the Great Commandment is hypocritical, vain and will end up causing us to not fulfill either.

How do we do both?

Is this true?

We have failed our strongest believers. Across the nation, churches are participating in a carefully researched study called Reveal. It details how the church is at its strongest and most influential when it is involved with people who are exploring who God is and who are just getting started in their faith. Yet, as people grow in their faith, the church shrinks in it is influence and impact in the life of a follower of Christ. Does that mean we have failed? I say, “yes” and “no.”

I say yes, because the cry of people who have faithfully walked with Christ and are living it out every day (this is different from people who have been a part of the church for a long time and have made very little spiritual progress), want more from their church. They want more food, more challenge, more opportunities, etc. And the church as it has focused on those younger or stalled in the faith have quite often presumed upon the maturity and commitment of their best people. This needs to change or the best people in our church will grow hardened or take their investments elsewhere. They may leave altogether. Or, they will probably stay in the pew but in their maturity and influence will model a passive version of mature spirituality that is dangerous in the life of a church.

I say “no” because of the principle of parenting. Paul uses this metaphor and it is helpful for us to understand the relationship between a church and a person in the church. The leadership in a church is often paralleled to parenting. Those who are new to the faith require a lot of attention--like infants and children. As believers grow their relationship to the church needs to parallel that of an individual within a family. Just as children and adolescents grow in their responsibility to share in the tasks of the home, so do young believers in the task of the church. Maturity in both should be marked by a growing independence (in personal management) and interdependence (or partnership in the family business). Just as a young adult needs to discipline him or herself to personally manage his responsibilities in partnership with his parents, so does a mature believer need to take personal responsibility to be a “self-feeder” and rely less and less on others for spiritual growth.

Check out more about the REVEAL Study at http://www.revealnow.com/readBlog.asp?pageid=13

Devotion

Like I said in my last entry, life scatters our thoughts. The antidote to being scattered is devotion. Devotion is good news (translated into Bible words=gospel) for those pulled in many directions. To those gripped by their offense before God as recorded in Acts 2, the good news was for them to repent of their sins and acknowledge Jesus as Lord and Christ. Sounds good. What did that look like? It looked like devotion.

Luke gives a paradigmatic look at what this repentance looks like in Acts 2:42-47. The summary I would give is devotion. They devoted themselves to the apostles teaching, to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. Devotion was and still is good news.

I wish I had seven cents for every time I heard someone say, “I need to slow down.” The busyness of life is a direct assault on devotion. I am growing in my conviction that a community is most powerful when it nurtures devotion. For the PTA, it nurtures devotion to effectiveness of public schools. For a church and a small group, it must nurture devotion to the things that nurture devotion to Christ.

But shouldn’t we just nurture devotion to Christ?

Why I am doing this

I am writing this because I have to. I think I will like it, but life scatters a person so much that after a while we can lose our ability to think deeply on things. I don’t suppose to put out deep thoughts, but I do know I must think and deeper than I do now. In particular, I need to think about how people follow Christ in Community. I am not the first thinker on this topic, so maybe I should describe this as “expressed listening.” I will be expressing what others, and most important, what God has to say about following Christ in community.

I cannot do this expressive listening by myself—for then I will be violating my intention of thinking about following Christ in community. I hope these thoughts become a conversation. Please add, subtract and edit and make this thinking an actual practice of following Christ in community.